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Monday, July 11, 2011

KARMA Chameleon: Not-so-sweet Revenge

Interesting story last week.  A woman seeking revenge on her ex-boyfriend got creative.  She decided to get back at him by posting personal contact information about his new wife on a XXX porn site.  In return, this woman was inundated with elicit calls for hours on end from horny guys looking for some strange.  Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.  Ain't that the truth.

I found this very telling.  This woman felt the need to hurt the other woman..not the man in her revenge scheme.  Why is this?   Now I do not know the intimate details about their relationship & it's downfall but it just confirms to me, once again, that women just don't like other women.  Sad, but true.

A Latin proverb states "Revenge is a confession of pain."  I like that.  Why admit that you are hurt? Revenge can be nasty thing.  We all have a sordid past when it comes to this.  We have all been wronged & secretly plotted out what we would like to do to the culprits. I'm just not sure we have all followed through with it.  There have been many crazy, sick & twisted stories of revenge over the years.  Ones that make you think "are these people for real?"

AMY FISHER:  The Long Island Lolita, as she was affectionately called, decided to confront her grease-ball boyfriend's wife & shoot her in the head.  That's one way to deal with it I guess.  I mean, I could see her attraction to Joey with his afro-mullet & his Zubza pants.  What a stud.

LISA "Left Eye" LOPES:  1/3 of TLC, may she rest in peace, decided she was going to get her then boyfriend, Andre Rison of the Atlanta Falcons, something to think about.  She showed him by lighting all the stuffed animals he had given her on fire in his bathtub.  Which, in turn, burnt his mansion to the ground.  Oops!

LORENA BOBBITT: This woman single-handedly placed fear in every man in America.  After years of supposed spousal abuse, Miss Lorena went to to the kitchen to get a glass of water one night & returned with a carving knife.  She proceeded to cut off her dear husband John's penis and the drove off with it.  She then tossed it out the window into an open field where it could no longer harm her.  After his "weapon" was recovered it took 9 hours for the doctors to re-attach his..um..thing. 

I must be a real wuss.  I may have plotted but never exacted revenge on anyone in my life.  Never shaved off someones eyebrows when they were sleeping, slipped Nair in a shampoo bottle or spray painted someones car.. It is amazing the level of psycho that people go to in times of turmoil.  All I know is that women have it over men in this capacity.  Women are calculating, smart & much better liars.  I mean this is the best possible way, of course.  The guys have no chance in competing here.  Sorry boys.

There is even a book to help you if you are so anemic in the revenge department you need assistance. Revenge for Dummies can help you find creative ways to embarrass, humiliate & retake control of the one's who have done you wrong.  Really?  Is this what has become of revenge?

Personally, I think most of these tactics make you look more desperate, needy & quite frankly, stupid.  You are not proving anything by trying to show who's boss here.  I am more of the opinion that things end, usually they end badly, and you deal with it. I mean, in Revenge of the Nerds, the Tri-Lambda's kicked the Alpha's asses, won the talent show (awesome routine, BTW) & showed everyone that success is the best revenge.  Corny? Yes, but true. Nothing better than running into an ex when you are dressed up, looking hot & can simply smile & walk by knowing that they are regretting doing you wrong.  Sure you would like to stop, throw a hay maker or your drink at them, but what is that going to prove?  Nothing. 

Karma is a bitch & she will find you. So please reconsider the next time you are plotting revenge.  Take a deep breath & remind yourself that what comes around ALWAYS goes around.  Right O.J.?

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