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Wednesday, September 21, 2011

You Are So Beautiful.....

Being a woman who has specialized in beauty for over 20 years I have come to a conclusion.  Women hate themselves.  I have yet to have a person sit down in my chair or lay on my table before a treatment & say “I love the way I am."  I find that sad.  I, of course, am one of these women too.  The "my skin is horrible, I have wrinkles, my ass is fat, I have saggy boobs, I hate my thighs, I’m too tall, too short, not good enough" women.  I want to know why this is.....

Any T.V. commercial, print ad or billboard will confirm that women are expected to look a "certain" way.  By certain I mean: skinny, flawless & perfect!  These unattainable & ridiculous aspirations are trying to be fulfilled every day.  Plastic surgery, fillers, hair extensions, spray tans are the supposed cure to these ailments.  (One look at Jwow will make you think otherwise.)  Why do we feel the need to constantly prove to everyone that we too can be this "perfect" creature?

I spend countless hours with women who spill their stories about their insecurities & self-loathing and it makes me want to scream "STOP IT!!!"  Will we ever, as women, be able to embrace our true selves and be happy?  Interesting question.

With this in mind, I have decided to make a list of things that I find beautiful about all women.  Some unorthodox, but still, beautiful in my eyes.

*A pregnant belly in all its glory
*A face free of makeup & dotted with freckles
*Those lines around the corners of your eyes only visible during a true smile
*Bodies of all shapes and sizes of those confident enough to own who they are
*Morning face, hair in a ponytail, in sweats on a Sunday morning
*Women in jeans with high heeled boots
*Hair with some roots & a little gray showing
*Your pooch belly that sits proudly above your waist, where your housed your 3 children for 27 months
*Cleavage, of course
*Thighs that are not the same width as your calves
*Asses that don't quit
*Anyone who has the guts to wear dark red lipstick
*An all-natural body, lees-than-perky breast, dimples on your legs & all

I supposed I could go on forever here.  Hey, women out there!  You are all beautiful in my eyes.  And despite what you might think, the men think so too.  Look in the mirror & see the real you.  It's pretty spectacular!

Monday, September 12, 2011

Never Gonna Give You Up: The 80's Obsession

I was an 80's girl.  I had big hair, bright clothes, wore Zinc Pink lipstick & was monumentally tan. I listened to Madonna and secretly tried to dress like her. (loved those black rubber bracelets & star earrings.)  I worshiped Duran Duran, thought Huey Lewis was adorable & actually believed Milli Vanilli was singing.  For as much as the 80's is ridiculed for it's lack of musical talent & fashion disasters, the obsession has never gone away.  The stores are once again filled with neon clothes, Flashdance-type off the shoulder sweatshirts & leggings.  Go ahead, make fun..but we all secretly still love it.

What amazes me the most is the never-ending popularity of the 80's music.  I believe it can be broken down into 3 sub-types:  pop, new wave & hair bands.  (Of course, 80's on 8, Hair Nation & 1st Wave are my go-to presets on Sirius.)  Being in the "cover band" scene just proves to me that these songs will live on forever.  Even the newbies still love that shit.  We did try to omit these crap-tastic songs from our set list on several occasions, but to our chagrin, they wanted to hear them.  So, we obliged & played them..over & over & over & over.......

Topping the "pop" list is the "i want to cheat on my girlfriend tonight" anthem "Your Love' by the Outfield.  The squealing screams from half-drink girls start from the the first mention of Josie.  This song is about as mediocre as it's cheesy, paper-propped video.  But they love it...and not just the girls. I challenge you to find one person that cannot recite the chorus.  It's a strange phenomena. 

We then move on to what my old band called, The Forbidden 3.  Those would include: " Jessie's Girl," "Summer of 69," and "867-5309, Jenny."  I am proud to say that we NEVER played these 3 tunes, but secretly know in our hearts that they would have killed in any room at any time.  Why?  No one really knows...but these songs are a sure-fire way to make the ladies dance & sing. (which really is your goal in a cover band.)

Moving on to some 80's rock...  You can't even think about the 80's without hearing that tasty intro by Slash in the oh-so-popular "Sweet Child O' Mine" in your head. I have to admit I do love this song & apparently so do the masses.  Another over played, over done song would be that damn Bon Jovi tune "Living on a Prayer"  not to be outdone by it's usual counterpart "You Give Love a Bad Name."  These 2 can be found on any cover band set list in the USA.  And let's not forget the king of all that is holy in the 80's...... (drum roll please..)  "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey is one of those tunes that gets you every time.  Love it or hate it this is one staple that is not going anywhere.  Everyone also loves a good hair band tune and anything from Whitesnake, Warrant, Skid Row or Ratt will do.  Poison & Motley Crue also deserve a mention as they seem to be the 2 bands always represented in the set list.

Now there are tunes that we, as band members, wished we could play out.  Maybe a B-side type ditty?  Every once in a while a band may sneak in one of these gems but it usually causes confusion.  What is this song?  God forbid we play something....different?  I think this will be my next venture.  A cover band that covers shit no one knows.  Maybe we will call ourselves: WTF?  GFY or Unpopular. The set list will be comprised of songs like the following:

Buffalo Stance by Neneh Cherry
Going Back to Cali by LL Cool J
Smooth Up In Ya by The Bullet Boys
Never Say Never by Romeo Void
Talk to ya Later by The Tubes
Change by John Waite
Let's Go All The Way by Sly Fox
Never Gonna Leave You by Pat Benatar
The Theme to The Greatest American Hero or
something by Air Supply  (just to really mess with your minds)

I think I would just like to see what kind of reaction playing "different" music would have.  That would be an interesting experiment.

No matter what the argument, the 80's, my friends, are never going away.  You can try but the people have spoken.  Damn you Josie!

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

The Sound of Silence

Ahhhh.  You hear that?  Yep, nothing.  Quiet.  It is officially the first day of school, the boys are off. I'm on my second cup of coffee and have to say I have missed this.  No yelling, no fighting, no noise.  Summer vacation pushed a lot of us to our breaking point this year. The looks on all the parents faces at the bus stop this morning confirmed this.  It truly is the most wonderful time of the year.

Summertime comes & goes and while it was fun & exciting, I was ready for it to end.  I am one of the "those" mothers I guess.  The ones who do enjoy spending time with the kids, but also enjoy spending time without them.  This is the second year in a row that the start of school was delayed.  Last year we got the news at 3pm the day before the proposed start day telling us that a pipe burst at the school and we would have to wait another 7 days.  That was not fun.  This year Hurricane Irene took our power and again, we were delayed another 5 days.

I forgot what it is like to be able to focus. This is my first blog in over a month.  Sorry about that.  I did try to get things going several times this summer, but I was distracted by the pouty faces, the screaming & the theme from Pokemon. I don't know what to do with myself right now.  These last two weeks were enough for me to pull my hair out.  The boys were at each other's throats.  To be expected, but not pleasant.  I was a little tired of being the referee.

I used to get a little sad on the first day, but the boys are getting older & it is not as traumatic for them or me anymore.  It seems to be the case with my neighbors as well.  I did not see any tears this year. No tantrums, no sad faces. This also reminds me that I'm getting older too.  I still make the kids pose for pictures with their backpacks on the front steps.  I know that they hate it, but these are the pictures I remember taking when I was young; the ones with the awkward poses in itchy new clothes & tight shoes.  I understand that they will not be little forever.  I want to remember these moments.

So, a little shout out to my moms & dad out there.  We made it!  Another summer in the books.  Congratulations for surviving the summer in all it's craziness.  I can put my whistle down, have some coffee & figure out what to do with this free time.  Get out there & enjoy your freedom, your time & most importantly, enjoy the silence